You don’t need anyone to tell you when your heart is broken. You know it.
• You might eat more often or completely lose your appetite.
• You might have a tough time concentrating or focusing on simple tasks.
• You might sleep more than usual or not be able to sleep at all.
• Your chest might feel tight or as if your heart has sunk into your stomach.
As time goes by the intensity of your grief might lessen. You might be able to function more easily and return to your normal eating and sleeping patterns. Over time, some people are able to return to their normal routines, but that doesn’t mean they have recovered from loss.
Unresolved grief is cumulative and cumulatively negative. It’s affects current and future relationships.
After a significant emotional loss such as death or end of a romantic relationship, people alter their life choices to protect their hearts from being hurt again. Have you ever done that?
• Do you refuse to talk about your loss?
• Do you avoid thinking about your loved one who died because good memories painful?
• Do you avoid places or events that remind you of someone who died?
• Do you only talk about their positives, refusing to admit they might have had some negative qualities too?
• Do you keep the same exact routines you did when they were still alive because you’re afraid you will forget them?
• Do you only talk about their negatives qualities as if they never did anything good?
• Do you avoid getting close to people? Unresolved grief is usually at the root of fear about any new relationships.
Is your life forever changed after a loss? Yes. There’s nothing wrong with grieving, but you don’t have to live the rest of your life in pain.
Is the quality of your life what you want it to be?
Imagine thinking about someone who died, or an ex, without feeling broken hearted. Imagine living and loving to the fullest. What would that be like for you?