A Grief Support Blog

This blog will allow you the opportunity to acquire both support and guidance after experiencing a significant loss.

6 Tips for Focusing at Work While Grieving a Breakup

Are you going through a breakup?
Is it difficult for you to concentrate?
That’s normal.
Breakups can feel like the whole world is crashing around you. The hopes, dreams and expectations you had for your future are crushed. Everything you see and hear triggers memories of your ex. When your heart is broken, your mind wanders to what you could have done differently, what you miss and analyzing what went wrong. One of the main things grievers complain about is being unable to focus, which can make it difficult to function at work.
If you’ve gone through a breakup you can probably relate to being unable to concentrate.  A common example is going to a coworker’s office to ask a question, but when you get there you can’t remember what you needed. Or tasks you’ve done a hundred times before seem completely overwhelming. There’s no question that it can be tough getting through the workday when your heart is broken and grieving a breakup. So what can you do?

Here are 6 ways to stay focused at work during a breakup:

1) Remember there is nothing wrong with you.  Grief is normal and natural and so is having a brain that wanders when you’re grieving. When you start thinking about your ex, gently try to bring your thoughts back to what you are working on.


2) Ask for help. Grievers want to be heard with dignity and respect. When you start thinking about your heartache, quickly pick up the phone and tell a friend. Depending on your work environment you might even be able to share what’s going on with a trusted coworker. Sometimes it helps to quickly share your thoughts and feelings, so you are able to return to work with a clear mind.


3) Focus on small tasks.  Instead of worrying about the huge project you have to do, work on one tiny aspect of the project.  Try to focus on little things.  Like they say, “take it one step at a time”.


4) Turn off your phone and stay away from social media. It’s hard to focus on work when you’re constantly checking to see if your ex has contacted you.


5) Be prepared to miss old habits. If you spoke with your ex everyday during your lunch breaks, lunchtime might be a painful reminder of your breakup. Be prepared by asking a close friend or coworker if they’ll be available to talk during lunch if you need them.


6) Work the Grief Recovery Method. If you have been given the tools to recover from loss, be sure use them, EVEN IF YOU ARE AFRAID.  Ultimately the best things you can do is get complete with the past because it will help you stay in the present moment. 


If you don’t have experience with The Grief Recovery Method there are a variety of options for you:
  • The Grief Recovery Handbook: A step-by-step guide to moving beyond death, divorce and others losses can be purchased HERE or you can find it for free at your local library.



If you want to talk about your options we are here for you. Schedule a call now.
Unfortunately time will not heal your broken heart. It simply lessons the intensity of your pain. The Grief Recovery Method will show you how to heal your broken heart.  
When you’re grieving, the thought of every feeling better seems impossible, but what have you got to lose? 
If you found this article helpful, you may also want to read Forgiveness After a Breakup.  You can also visit our Grief Blog to search for other articles on a wide range of topics, or sign up to receive new articles as they are published.


My advice would be to take a few days off, stay at home and just think about it. Live your grief, succumb to it to the fullest, embrace it. And in a few days you will be ready to get back to the living. Your heart won't be healed but your grief will be numb.

At least that's what helps me pass through hard times. I know everyone reacts different to that kind of things...

Thank you for your comment, Bo. There are a few other ways to help ease the pain of a break up as well. We have a book that specifically deals with breakups and can be found here: https://www.griefrecoverymethod.com/books/moving-on. Also, there are local support groups that can be found at https://www.griefrecoverymethod.com/grief-support-groups which may be helpful as well. Thank you, Brittany

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